I am trying different art techniques and I get kind of obsessive when the art is not going my way. I have been used to 'getting what I want' after doing a lot of research on how to get some of the techniques right and when I have to scrape a painting it doesn't feel good. This is of course normal, but at the same time when I start obsessing and can't let go until perfect I know I am letting my ego being in charge. It is an ego boost to get the painting perfect in the first try and when things does not work out I am working on the painting until it is so ugly that I have to start over. When this happens I have to take a step back and take a breather from it because if I let the ego have its way I will end up working at the art table all night, which is no longer enjoyment but more like an obsessive drive to show that I can win.
When I let it go, drop the perfection obsession, I can breathe again. I stop breathing when I am in the obsessive mode, and if you catch yourself stop breathing then you know you are walking on thin ice. I know this can lead to the annoying OCD behaviour and OCD can often be lurking in the back of my brain. I know I could go all OCD but I will not let that happen because it is so draining and tiring and no fun to let the OCD monster be in charge. So I sit down, put both of my feet on the floor and take a deep breath. Reset and I am back to normal, my normal at least ;).
My name is Annica Johansson and I am a Career and Talent Coach. I am writing about personal development, daily musings, spirituality and depicting mother nature's amazing beauty.